referendum poem

Like many people I have greatly enjoyed the tremendously bad poetry about the referendum as people have put together words on a page with no sense of the shape of the words on the page, how to use space,  or any conception of subtlety, word choice or rhythm. The self important political poetry has been of such quality that I for one am grateful that the internet exists in order to allow its full dissemination.

however, how easy is it to write bad referendum Poetry lacking all of the qualities that one would expect from poetry? I thought I would try for a good five minutes or so using the challenge most seemed to have set themselves:  lines with no or nursery rhythm; littered with clichés and adverbs; and a Simple rhyming scheme.

I therefore unveil

September 18, 2014

I am sure that I will for rest of my life certainly remember

That initially foggy day in the middle of September.

I attended the polling station nearby just before eight

My heart full of hope, and devoid of hate

Apart from for those who would do Scotland down

Who I Stared at as they walked in, while giving a frown.

On the ballot with pencil I marked a big X

But waiting for the result I and my wife were turned into nervous wrecks

And as I watched the twitter timelines and saw the tweets from tannadicelad

I realised for yes the results they could be bad.

[and so on for weeks]


About loveandgarbage

I watch the telly and read when not doing law stuff and plugging my decade and a half old unwatched Edinburgh fringe show.
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2 Responses to referendum poem

  1. Steven Hope says:

    You need to get over to the Scot Language Centre’s page on Facebook to see such gems as this:

    My puir dear Scotland aa forlorn
    Chained like the Royal Unicorn.
    Oor thristle trampled in the dew
    Will grow again with passion new.
    Whilst the rising of oor loyal folk
    Will cast aside the Saxon yoke.
    The cries for freedom still remain
    Tae thwart the quisling traitor’s shame.
    Remember Wallace and Calgacus
    When dark forces dae attack us.
    Dinnae forget the true and brave
    Auld Alba shall be naebody’s slave

    Or …

    O’er,nearly,ae twa year campaign
    Ne’er shall we see the like again
    At the start they did ignore us
    Thocht we’d vanish if they made nae fuss.
    Then they held us in ridicule
    Like some king’s medieval fuil
    Then(though they kenned we had the richt)
    Aff wi’ the gloves,intae the fecht.
    Currency,defence,the NHS
    Pensions,education an’ the rest
    Project Fear,their master plan
    Alistair Darling their main man.
    In T.V. debate wi’ Salmond near tae
    (Since Davie Cameron wis a feartie)
    The No folk thocht it jist a stroll
    ’til YES made gains in every poll.
    Then up they cam,the thrie amigos
    Jist tae trip ower their ain egos
    An’whit I thocht jist a mirage
    Wis ae loose cannon ca’d Farage.
    In Dunedin,frae the West.
    Ten thoosand clad in high vis vest
    Playin’ flute,drum and recorder
    The massed ranks o’The Orange Order.
    Gi’en fulll coverage by biased BBC
    (A’ the yessers in Glesgie they didnae see)
    Better thegither in disarray
    Fu’ o’ panic and dismay.
    Noo,in their time o’sorrow
    They offer Scotland jam tomorrow
    They tak us for a herd o’stirks
    For there’s a spanner in the works.
    Loud cries frae Lunnon a story tells
    “We’ll block that” say the Tory rebels
    Sae listen not tae lies and bribes
    That quisling traitor Broon describes
    Get doon tae that polling station
    Vote YES for this Scottish Nation.

    Which was received with mixed reviews. One said,

    Burns wad be prood o ye

    Although commenter, Lizzie Lawrenson, lavished it with the praise that, “Well it rhymed…”

  2. Miche says:

    Oh, the eighteenth of September was a momentous day
    From the banks of the Clyde to the silvery Tay.
    And when the count was done, without undue delay,
    Many a heart was happy and gay,
    But there were those who said, with much dismay,
    “I hoped the answer would not be nay.”

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