The world of the British media was shocked to its very core today when it became apparent that a thing was happening (or not happening) in London. Early media reports about the thing were sketchy as the media had only the vast majority of their reporters on the ground in London, but thankfully more detailed regular reports going on and on about the thing which was not happening, or happening, in London became available as the massed cohort of reporters got out of their beds and went to the end of their streets before filing reports. Luckily, these selfless individuals, and the management of their respective media organisations, managed to fill almost all of the available airtime of radio and television stations, and newspaper websites explaining that a thing was not (or was) happening in London within literally minutes – while pontificating at length about the impact that the thing is (or is not) having on people from London.
The thing that is not (or is) happening in London has proved so controversial that the blogosphere has published a veritable plethora of considered (or ill-considered) comment arguing that it is a good (or bad) thing that is not (or is) happening in London.
News people in London, in a vain attempt to give some UK-wide relevance to the thing that is not (or is) happening in London have noted that some people from outside London, who may be near London, may be inconvenienced (or not) by the events.
A BBC Question Time special examining the thing that is not (or is) happening in London will take place later this week – where the chairman, David Dimbleby, will stress how relevant the thing that happened (or did not happen) in London was to people from as far away from central London as Watford.
Worries grow outside London that the thing that is (or is not) happening in London is of such a level of seriousness that it is detrimentally affecting the ability of news people in London to get a sense of proportion.