Migrainewatch is an independent think tank. Since being created in early October 2010 its thinking has been carried out in an old fish tank in Mr Jones from number 58’s garage, at least until he gets the garage converted into a proper meeting room. It will be chaired by Tony Green, a former referee on the television gameshow Bullseye – whose regular calls of “180” give him a particular expertise in the causes of migraines – once we have sent him the letter to act as chairman. Meantime Mrs Glendinning from number 70 chairs our organisation. She used to work on the pharmacist’s counter at Boots and is well placed to comment on headaches . We have a distinguished Advisory Council from diverse ethical and professional backgrounds (comprising Mrs Glendinning, Mr Jones, me, and a nearby builder).

We entirely accept that genuine headaches should be accepted as a natural hazard of human life. However, nowadays – on account of the ridiculous and spurious actions of various bodies – many headaches arrive in the UK as a result of people banging their heads against the walls in response to these actions.

Our purpose is to monitor developments, conduct research, and provide the public with full and accurate facts about headaches induced (however indirectly) by the silly actions of people who really ought to know better. We do this by placing such information in a slightly satirical context, designed to maximise the ridiculousness of the actions. 

Since its formation this evening we have provided research for a cross party group containing a collection of irate individuals upset that we had interfered with their celebrations this evening. Details of the cross party group can be found at letshaveanotherpartywithouttheinterferenceofpeoplemakingstupidpoints.com

Unlike most organisations in this field, we receive no subsidy from the government in any form and have no intention of seeking one. However, we are intending to be funded at least in part by fees for appearing in various media outlets where we can pontificate about the irrational actions that cause very rational headbanging by otherwise normal reasonable people who cannot believe how stupid some people are throughout the UK.


Here, at Migraine Watch old Mr Jones was particularly concerned about an action that caused him to throw his head repeatedly of his desk shouting, “How bloody stupid can you get?” This caused him a headache and consequently fell within our remit.  Apparently, a body known as Migration Watch – which contrary to Mrs Glendinning’s belief has little interest in the winter flight plans of the Brent goose or dunlin – has threatened legal proceedings against Sally Bercow a political activist with a previously expressed interest in libel reform. The full papers of the claim (and the reply) are available here – and argue that a company limited by guarantee (and a man who is not mentioned in the alleged defamatory remarks) are defamed by a political activist arguing that its analysis of the problems of society is wrong.

If an attempt to suppress democractic debate through the vehicle of the libel courts seems an absurd over-reaction to you, causing you to throw your head repeatedly against an inanimate object such as a table, or a wall, or a book detailing the migratory cycle of the Brent goose, perhaps you would like to help support Migraine Watch and report other instances of headaches occurring in the UK as a result of people banging their heads against the walls in response to the ridiculous and spurious actions of various self-important self-appointed bodies.

Meantime why not join in sending a message of support to Sally Bercow who in being prepared to stand up to such spurious claims is showing up English libel law for the ridiculous regime it is.


Please do not mistake Migrainewatch for Migrationwatch. Clearly they are completely absolutely fundamentally different things.

About loveandgarbage

I watch the telly and read when not doing law stuff and plugging my decade and a half old unwatched Edinburgh fringe show.
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3 Responses to Migrainewatch

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention Migrainewatch | Love and Garbage – some commonplace musings -- Topsy.com

  2. Jac says:

    Thoroughly enjoyed this, thank you. Just a little concerned about Mr Jones.

  3. Brilliant and highly entertaining – a missed vocation in writing comedy drama.
    Thank you.

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