For those freeview viewers a heads-up that the original Bullseye is broadcast regularly in early evenings on FTN. Thrill to Jim Bowen taking a couple of minutes to count out £80. Rejoice as Bully checks the spelling by walking across the bottom of the screen. Marvel at the assonance and dissonance of Jim’s ditties on Bully’s Prize Board. Laugh as professional darts players score less with 9 darts than the amateurs did in the round before the break. And revel in the catchphrases:
“We’ve had a lovely day, Jim, we’d like to give someone else a chance.” trs – I’m rubbish and under pressure Ted’ll buckle. We’re buggering off before we lose the video.
“Keep out of the black and in the red, there’s nothing in this game for two in a bed.” trs – an unusual literary commentary on Stendahl by Bowen, a former ENglish teacher.
“Look at what you could have won.” trs – Jim attempts to explain the doctrine of equity in English law and the bijural nature of land registration in Scotland by reference to a speedboat or a caravan and the lack of success by the non-darts player.
“Should they gamble? You have the time it takes for the board to revolve .” trs – Jim displays previously untapped Nuremberg style tendencies in the British public by demanding a chorus of “Gamble” from a doped and duped studio audience. If Bowen had tapped into this raw energy he would today be celebrating two and a half decades as supreme ruler of the United Republic of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.