Friday night with loveandgarbage

While auditioning to replace Jonathan Ross I have been advised by the BBC to practise the carrying out of regular Friday interviews with top celebrities. Today – in keeping with most episodes of Tonight with Jonathan Ross – I’m delighted to be joined by TV funnyman, chubby funster, Ricky Gervais. Well Ricky, how are you?

And where do you stand on the use of the widowhood system for preparing for distance races? Do you think that you can really get a good 500 mile performance out of your pigeons on it?

And would you try the roundabout system in order to get hens to those long distances too? I mean, a good hen can hang on later at night in my experience.

So turning to that film you did about lying – I loved it. (Do you see what I did there? I invented lying again tonight). With a high cocnept film like that are you worried about losing narrative coherence by having a world where people tell the truth even when unpalatable?

Anyway, enough about your work – have you any views on whether a system of registration of title has a curative or non-curative effect on defects contained within conveyances? And do you think the state should guarantee titles and bear the cost of compensation?

And retrospective legislation – should Parliament retrospectively create rights to payment the court has ruled do not exist?

And the darts – what about the Hankey match then? Do you think he was still recovering from his performance in the Grand Slam?

Okay, do your dance. Do it. Your dance. Do it now. That one where you were in The Office.

And on The office and Extras do you worry that adding a dimension of mawkish sentimentality to your comedies to give the illusion of depth works? And if you admire Seinfeld, Larry Sanders and Curb Your Enthusiasm so much – why haven’t you learned that you don’t need hugs, happy endings and messages?

Yeah, do the dance again.

Great.

Thank you very much Ricky Gervais.

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