From next Monday’s news
The funeral of TV presenter Jeremy Beadle who died last week was disrupted by a series of unfortunate events. The hearse driving Beadle’s coffin to the church was stopped at a set of roadworks and received a parking ticket from a traffic warden with a large beard and a clipboard. Then, following the arrival of the hearse at the church the pallbearers unfortunately dropped the coffin on the way in. After a couple of attempts to pick up the coffin, during which the handles fell off, the pallbearers managed to lift the coffin onto the back of one of their number who managed to take it into the church. The untimely appearance of a local council officer investigating the presence of asbestos in the church disrupted the service – and forced the service to be relocated to a nearby hall.
The coffin when being lowered in to the grave dropped the six feet opening the lid, when one of the ropes on whcih it was being lowered mysteriously snapped.
A spokesman for the family said, “It’s what he would have wanted.”