No comment needed on the following from Lord Pooter’s diary on 9th March
“I’ve just learned that Macmillan will be printing a third edition of The Gospel According to Judas ten days before publication; however it may not reach the bookshops before publication day, 20th March, and therefore those of you who would like a first edition should order it now from your local bookshop or amazon [link deleted to make acquisition of the book at least a little more difficult] who are selling it for an incredible £5.99.
“You may be amused to read page 39 of The Times today, where you will discover that ‘The Pope gives his blessing to the gospel of Jeffrey Archer’ – search as I did for a mention of His Holiness in the article, I couldn’t find it.”
If you don’t want a copy of the exceedingly rare first edition (as read by Desmond Tutu - Jeff’s “first choice for this project [ie reading the audio book - is it because subliminally Jeff thinks Desmond is a Judas of some sort? I think we should be told]) then you could donate the money to a worthwhile charity, or spend it phoning to vote for Ray “Shouty” Stubbs on Comic Relief. Ray would be a worthy successor to the creepy schoolgirl obsessive that represented the Uk in last year’s Eurovision. Perhaps somehow the two votes can be tied together.
Stubbs was ace at all that Dad Rock crap, he let himself down badly with Strangers In The Night though. I think he should’ve gone for some sort of gonzoid Jim Morrison delivery. That would’ve, er, not actually worked but it would’ve been fun.
Mel Giedroyc in that pink frock looking like Doris Day’s slutty sister. Yum.
Now there’s a metric for if you’ve been nudging the malts a bit too much.
If you can type “Giedroyc” without falling off, you’re not drunk
I don’t drink and I’ve never been able to spell it properly
Mel (and Tim) were the only ones worth watching for. They didn’t seem to be taking it too seriously (although when Tim was voted out you realised just how seriously he was taking it). Although (in hyperbole watch) to describe Mel’s fake fall as “the funniest thing I have ever seen” suggests that Lesley garrett has perhaps been raised ona diet of My Family, Mind your language, and On the Buses movies.
Barry of Eastenders is a ringer, of course. We afficionados of bad telly remember that he was a regular on the excellent CHannel 5 show, Night FEver, Now, whatever happened to the FUnky Monkey?
We love Stubbsy! Sadly we shall never hear him singing Parklife now . . .
Shaz